It truly takes no time at all for Nick to follow Peter and Taylor to a public place and snap a bunch of photos of the two of them having sex, so whatever Craig is paying him for surveillance…it’s too much. Elsewhere at Kyle’s, Carter is loving his new life as a dishwasher, until loitering in the parking lot makes him subject to menacing by a random street tough — and, believe it or not, his week gets even worse after that. Jake returns to Los Angeles to try to reconcile with Alison, and stupid Sam continues being a crappy friend when she volunteers to help. Megan is still trying to prove that Kimberly does not, in fact, need Michael’s attention full-time, but by the time the episode ends, she’s going to be nostalgic for the time when Kimberly was her biggest problem. Put away your atlas; we’re going to tell you all about “Men Are From Melrose”!